Gone but Not Forgotten 

Pregnancy loss. 

Miscarriage.

Still Birth.

Infant loss.

1 in 4 couples experience horrifying news such as these when growing their families. 1 in 4 couples grieve the loss of a child they love so dear, yet never met…Or only met for a short while. 

25%. That is a tremendous amount of people having to say goodbye too soon. 

The month of October is set aside to bring awareness to this heartfelt issue.  An issue that my husband and I know so well. Through the 4 years in which we struggled with infertility, we lost 2 precious babies in miscarriage. 2 little lives I have never meet yet I think about them daily. How my oldest would have turned 4 this past March. And how I would have three little ones running around bringing such joy to our home. 

The thoughts are always there. The pain has left a mark that is hard to hide at times. Inwardly, my emotions scream with “whys”. Why me? Why this child? Why now? I may never know. Outwardly? I put a smile on and, for the most part, most people have no idea what we have gone through, unless they follow my blog. 

I am not as open about the issue in public/in person as I am here.  Maybe because it’s just easier to write out my thoughts than to speak them. But I do feel as though these things should not be held in completely. 

To those of you who may be reading this are have had the heartache and pain of loosing a child too soon. Know that I am praying for you. I am here for you. You are always in my thoughts. The pain and heartache may never go away. But it gets manageable. And, God? He has His arms wrapped around you to comfort you more than you know. Feel free to share your story. With me. With a friend. We should never forget the precious lives we carried. Even if it was for a short while. 

My husband and I are truly blessed with our little rainbow baby, Millie Anne. She is our miracle gift from God. She brightens my day with her smile and brings such joy to those around her. We love her to pieces! But, even with such a gift it will never wipe away the memory I have for my other two babies. What it does do, however is make me understand and realize how precious life really is. God has blessed each of us with our own life and that in and of itself is a gift to be cherished. 

( I wrote a blog post with the story behind each miscarriage. Click the titles to read more. When Happy Places Turn sad And What’s in a name?

If you would like to share here on my blog feel free to email me your testimony at fertileatheart@gmail.com and let me know if I am free to share it. 

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